I’m kind of introverted. Well, I’m very introverted actually, so sometimes it was okay. I was like great because I want to be alone, but other times like I need somebody. I remember during middle school and high school. I think I had basically nobody to talk to outside of my family about like this is what I am struggling with the Lord. Like, “Why isn’t He talking to me? Why can’t I hear His voice? Why is it this day I hear Him so well and other days I don’t?” I met somebody and we became very, very good friends. He was a boy, but we were friends, and it was middle school-like friendship. I realized that this is a friend. This is a person that will push me toward the Lord. I began to be friends with other girls at church and connecting with them and realizing that I was no longer lonely, and I didn’t have to like, just be by myself all the time because I was gaining friends. I now have four friends that I know that I could call at two o’clock in the morning if I needed something. I could call in the afternoon at a regular time and say, “I need you to pray for me.” These people will call me back. They will text me, and they will say, “What do you need? I am here praying for you. Like, I am reaching out to the Lord for you. I am here to help you.” Through all of that time, the Lord was still there and I still felt Him very strongly, but I felt very lonely.
Well, me and Alison went to a trip. We went to a camp with the church group. We were good friends until that too, but we were like good friends, and not good friends and good friends just like how life goes. Then she came to me, and it was during a time where I was really struggling, and I was like, “God, I am so lonely. I don’t know how to do this without people who are going to push me towards the Lord.” She came to me during the middle of a worship service and just came to me, she is so sweet, she goes, “Rebecca, I just feel like the Lord wanted me to tell you that I want to be friends with you for a really, really long time.” At that moment, I was like, “Wow.” I was so overwhelmed because I had never had any kind of direct answer from the Lord like that because I had been praying a year. Six months to a year for like, “God, I just need a friend.” With that, like everything changed, how I perceived people and how I used to be super judgmental, and I would profile people like this. I was like, “You say this, but you’re doing this.” The Lord was like, “No. 1st Peter 2:9. Who are they in me? Who are you in me?” That began to change everything, and I am still not perfect and I never will be, but the Lord is continually changing me and molding me. I am His clay. He is the potter, and He is continually molding me into who He wants me to be.
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